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I am so angry that my stomach is in knots. Every single time I call any institution in the UK (my bank, HRMC, estate agents.....) I end up in such a rage I hang up the phone on some poor sod. Before I call, I tell myself to keep calm, to be nice and to tell them what they want. Every time a flipping, fucking coconut I end up incandescent with rage. Why is it SO hard to get anything done there? Why can I never give them enough numbers or details or jump through their hoops to get things done?

Australia is not perfect, but customer service and understanding still exists here. Some of the time. What shocked me after I first got back, is how friendly people are. Clearly not everyone, but most people say hello to you and take a minute to ask a question and actually listen to your response. I was freaked out by it at first.

Enough ranting. The film festival was really impressive. It finished on Sunday and my, what a marathon. In fact a lot of the films I saw really blew me away, taking me to places I never expected all over the world. Though why do so many films have to be dark in tone and content? I know life is no picnic, but I longed for a HAPPY GO LUCKY moment in the fest, but ended up with THE BASTARDS. I needed to chug red wine after that one. Sheesh.

My friend Nichole, who I met in India, is living in Melbs (she's moved into a fab house in West Brunswick with a friend from London called Jane) and I suggested she volunteer at the festival. We had such a blast meeting up and going over what we'd seen, often going to films together or showing up at the events that the other was working. It was such fun to share the fest with someone on a regular basis throughout. I'm used to attending festivals all over the world and meeting up with all sorts of colleagues but Melbourne has been very different.

Instead of being in a foreign city, where you're only there for meetings and the festival, I was trying to work and juggle my life here, so it was not my usual festival experience. At first I felt displaced and out of the loop, but quickly I met people and saw films that inspired me. In one day, I went from from Russia (Iranian director) to Korea and the Philippines (Korean director) to Algeria and the Western Sahara (Aussie & Bolivian Co-Directors) and ended up in London thanks to an Argentinean director.

All the films were worthwhile, but the documentary STOLEN which confronted slavery in the refugee camps of Algeria was explosive. In fact, I saw some incredible docs at the fest. The one on Rebiya Kadeer, the Uighar leader, (10 CONDITIONS OF LOVE) that has caused all the uproar was definitely a highlight. Not because it was the best doc I've ever seen, but due to the Chinese kicking up such a fuss, a small little doc became such a sensation - they had to move the screening to the town hall to fit everyone.

Mrs Kadeer has sacrificed so much for her people, (some of her children are in prison simply for being hers), and she spoke beautifully, with such passion before and after the screening. It's sad that 7 Chinese films were pulled from the fest because they refused to cancel this doc. And that the festival site was constantly attacked by hackers, simply for supporting freedom of speech. It makes you realise how incredibly lucky we are to take it for granted as a fact of life. As well as fundamental human rights, which STOLEN explores with its journey in Algeria and Western Sahara.

Irrelevant of how strong one might feel the actual films are, and there are some important failings though they give good viewing, they are both stories by passionate, committed filmmakers who did their utmost in very tricky circumstances to tell stories they felt should be told. It was fascinating to hear the audience at each session (I love a good Q&A) and to see how the filmmakers handled their questions. Being a filmmaker is tough, being a documentary filmmaker is even tougher. There is such little money and you have to fight so hard to get the film completed and then actually just get it out there to audiences.

I ask you how Jeff Daniels, the director of the doc about Rebiya Kadeer's life, managed to hold down a teaching job and spend 7 years of his life on this one piece of film? It's impossible for us mortals to imagine the pressure that's been put on him during this time and since the political explosion that erupted when MIFF programmed his film. The ramifications have been huge. But he's clearly drawn so much inspiration from his subject, that he's had the strength to go on. I salute them all.

I'd love to go into all the feature films that I adored, but two really stick out in my mind (apart from the fantastic Aussie film BALIBO) and those are the Icelandic film THE WHITE WEDDING and the British film UNMADE BEDS. They transported me completely and utterly to their destinations. And I ached for London after seeing the latter. It captured the freedom and eccentricities of that maddening city so well.

ANTICHRIST was an utterly nutty experience, but I have to say that I love Lars Von Trier for his truly unique vision. I can see why Charlotte Gainsbourg got Best Actress in Cannes. Bloody hell. It's all it's cracked up to be in the sadistic, artistic stakes. Gulp!

Now, I'm letting all those movies flow through me and I'm re-writing the feature that I've been working on a lot of this year. Hamish and I have got some industry people interested in reading it so the pressure is on. I've kidnapped Minnie (Hame's dog) and absconded to the coast, where I'm alone at our parent's place (except for Min!) and it's heaven. They're off in the Kimberleys (Western Oz) seeing the astounding Bradshaw rock paintings with their new best friends the Frasers. Gosh life is funny. I just have to laugh out loud sometimes at the absurdity of my existence.

I pray that over the next few days, I can reach deep down inside and find the strength to do this script justice. I am so grateful to all my heavenly mates who keep sending me such encouragement, as I can't tell you how much I need your prayers. I am terrified to finally put this script out there and can't believe that next week it will be in the ether. I saw the most incredible speech on TED's site today thanks to Miranda Barber, who sent me the link. It was by an author of a book I didn't much like, but the way she described the creative process and some fascinating issues surrounding it was really inspiring.

Mellie and Kiko, you made me laugh so much. Thank you.
And Pip your feedback has been invaulable. As always.
More soon. Lxxxxx